I took the pill last night so that I can at least have a chance at NOT being pregnant. And if it happens, I know it's God's will. He'll be inprocessing today so I won't be having sex for a little while.

If we DO decide to have a baby, I'd move down to him. We were looking at apartments and houses down the Tacoma/Ft Lewis area. We also checked out his BAH and other payment stuff to see how much income we'd have just with him working. I'd also work until I couldn't anymore [either having the baby or my boss asking me to leave- I work at a coffee shop and I'm not sure how long he'd like a pregnant woman working there.] If I moved in with him, I'd be able to put my paychecks aside in a savings accout so we'd have more of a cushion and not living paycheck to paycheck. I'll be starting school in Sept and the baby would be born at the beginning of next year so I'll have one semester down and could potentially continue going if we get childcare. That one is a toss up though because I want to stay at home for at least the first year. So I'd have to sacrifice that.

If we DON'T have a baby now, we can plan ahead for one. We can take our time finding the right place. Decide if we want to live in a large apartment or rent/buy a house. [He prefers to buy in TX since we'll be moving down there in he doesn't reenlist at the end of 5 years]. I can start and finish school and we can start putting money aside for the baby. I could also move in with him down the road and do the paycheck aside thing starting sooner.

The thing is we BOTH want a baby. Moreso him than I. Don't get me wrong I wanna be a mommy and if I'm pregnant or become pregnant soon I'd love it! I'm just worried about the family's opinion. But then again, they've done MORE to piss me off lately so I'm at the point where I don't give a flying **** sometimes. I just want to make sure we'll be able to do this on our own without anyone's support [financially, emotionally, physically, etc]. 

Last night we talked to his sister and he told her I might be pregnant [which is a definite possibility as I took the pill when it becomes less effective] and she said she supported us if we felt we were ready. I think today he's gonna tell his mom the same thing. I told my sister I might be and she was kinda freaked but not too badly. Idk...We'll see. 

I love my husband and I want to make him happy. If giving him a son or daughter would make him happy, I'd do it. We've also got a lot of time. I want to leave it in Gods hands and let Him decide what's right for us. Only time will tell I suppose...

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