end of an era.

well, it's here.

the last day of being in my early twenties.

tomorrow? 25.

TWENTY. FIVE.

*sigh*

i'd be a big fat liar if i didn't say there's some sadness coursing through my body. i feel like twenty five is so huge. like i'm no longer a kid. people will either take me seriously or expect me to behave seriously. like i can't just be goofy anymore.

now. i KNOW this isn't the case. i'm going to still be me. i guess it's just more like it has always been okay to not know where things are going or to be floating aimlessly around trying to "find" yourself. but now? nahsomuch.

in my mind, it's always been a huge mile marker. life will be like "THIS" when you're twenty five. i've always been a planner. i just knew i'd have a husband, kids, be working towards a specific career, happy, healthy and financially stable at twenty five. and on some level, this is all true. but is it exACTly what i'd imagined? nope. not even close. and sometimes that terrifies me. i feel like i'm not where i'm supposed to be.

...but then, i remember.

it's never been up to me ANYWAY.

i may not be where i  have always wanted to be,

but i'm exactly where HE needs me to be.

so tomorrow...when the clock strikes 3:02pm, i'll begin breathing in my twentyfifth year.

i'll celebrate my twenty-fifth time around the sun.

i'll thank Jesus for this one more year. another chance.

and i'll move wherever it is that He wants me to move.

and then i'll party like it's 1999, y'all.